Points to ponder before getting into a relationship

1)   are you actually ready?

So often we jump into a relationship for us! We think that once we have a partner all our problems will fade away!

NEWS FLASH all it does is put the problems on your new partner. You need to discover your identity and understand your value before you enter into a new relationship. You need to know that you are worth a lot before you settle for someone who does not treat you like the best thing to ever happen to them.

Girls! If I can say one thing. Don’t spend your days worrying about getting a fella. A girls heart should be so lost in God that the guy has to seek God in order to find it.

You don’t need to be a girl who needs a man but rather a girl that a man needs. What I mean by that is if you are secure in who you are and not worried about when and how, you will find men need a woman like that!

Confident in who you are in Christ.

Enjoy building your foundation in Christ and the rest will come.

2) The foundation of your relationship should be built on friendship not lust

Believe it or not the butterflies in your stomach won’t last forever, you won’t always feel that happy joyful feeling towards your partner and you will have to have something stronger than LUST and DESIRE to keep you together. By forming the friendship before the physical you build a strong foundation which will hold you together through ups and downs, highs and lows and you will remain committed. You won’t wake up one morning saying “what am i doing with this person” you will know why you are with them you will have the foundation for LOVE to be birthed.

3) Get yourself esteem from God NOT your partner

In our culture today it seems pretty normal for guys and girls to kiss random people at anytime during a night out. Apart from the obvious of kissing being a nice sensation why do people do it? It’s because it builds our confidence and helps us with self esteem. the only thing is we were not created to kiss all these random people to feel good about ourselves. Lots of people get their self-esteem from the words or physical affection from a partner. because of this they can’t live without one. Even the thought of being on their own scares them so they remain with their partner even if it is unhealthy or they are not in love. We were made in the image of God, and he calls us his masterpiece (Ephesians 2v8). God will Never change, never move and never be defeated! So by putting our security in him and getting our self esteem from God it is not only healthy but everlasting! partners may come and go making you feel good or bad about yourself but God is around forever so get your confidence, Self esteem and Identity from Him.

4) They could be the one?

It seems normal or good to have a few partners so you can practice and learn for when you eventually meet the one. The problem is when we have this attitude or mindset we don’t give our full commitment and the relationship becomes just a selfish season of our life.

Worth thinking about:

• Only get into a relationship if you’re ready to give your time, effort and devotion to that person
• Only get into a relationship with someone who you could eventually end up marrying (you won’t know this straight away but it has to be a possibility otherwise your wasting your time and theirs)
• Only get into a relationship if your ready to be 100% committed to that person (Cheating is not an option)
• Only get into a relationship if you won’t be looking elsewhere to see if the grass is greener.  (love your partner as if they are Mr/Miss Universe)
• Only get into a relationship if your ready to have the time of your life, have amazing experiences and share the rest of your years together.

LOVE?

We love our family and yet we love McDonalds? We love our Partner but love our car? Do we know what love really is?  GOD is LOVE and until we know what it means to be loved by Him we can never love others or understand love the way we were designed to.

Gods love is sacrificial

Gods love is whole

God is love

 1 Corinthians 13v3 (MSG)

no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love.

Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have.
Love doesn’t strut,
Doesn’t have a swelled head,
Doesn’t force itself on others,
Isn’t always “me first,”
Doesn’t fly off the handle,
Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn’t revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,

But keeps going to the end.

Love never dies!